Saturday, September 17, 2011

Home Sweet Home?

I called Portland my home! I moved here five years ago and just loved it. I built an awesome network of friends and the city suited my personality. It truly helped me grow and made me who I am today. I started eating healthier, opening my mind, being more patient, and became a green maniac.

Being in PDX was intense for many reasons; felt like a deer in headlights. Mtg up w/ people in small batches was mentally draining (but worth it). So much has happened to me since then, it is hard to really catch up. Physically I was all over town while taking care of errands like going to the dentist, annual doctor visit, Mac genius appt, good will, doing a radio travel interview, visiting gear shops, seeing new friend's mom, etc.
I could not help but remember my life here. I was super planned all the time. Trying to make the most of my free precious time b/c I spent most of my time unhappily. I cannot relate to PDX anymore. I was teary-eyed when I left in Feb, but it does not feel like home anymore. It’s a great sustainable city mix, but I just desire more nature. My friends are the best part making it the hardest to leave.

I always had a job in PDX. Now I got to see the other side. Young people don’t come here to retire, referenced from the funny TV show Portlandia. The fact is there’s just ain’t enough work. There are tons of educated people constantly moving here and it is easy to sink into the sin city. Nuddie bars and awesome, cheap beer surrounds you. Drinking sake w/ caffeine just to keep up w/ the fun. Public welfare and unemployment is part of the new retirement package. Of course, I am exaggerated a tad here just for fun.

It was great seeing familiar faces. Unfortunately, I was scattered and full of anxiety as I still had “stuff” to sort through while debating what to do this winter.  I am truly amazed w/ how much clothes I have and how hard it is to let go. It was taxing 6 months ago and basically I put those decisions on hold.

Though I have a general plan, it is not as easy like move to Denver next month. Why do I torture myself like this? Sometimes I wish I’d want to “settle”. Routine and structure are comforting. But no, I want to see the world. I can’t believe I am thinking about traveling for another 6 months! Not having my own space has made me weary on this whole trip. Yes, a choice I made to save money while meeting rad people. But I am getting tired all around. And I have yet to master the art of backpacking.

As I waited in Houston for 1 of 2 connection flights, I identified with Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz, waking up from a dream. I was in Portland, now I’m “home” on the road that’s the new norm for me. Tx you Katy for hosting me for 2 whole weeks in a studio apt. It’s not easy having someone over for so long and share small space. Click here for some pix.

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